Too much to ask

It's the first time I've ever felt this lonely, Wish someone cure this pain It's funny when you think it's gonna work out Till you chose weed over me you’re so lame I thought you were cool until the point, Up until the point you didn't call me when you said you would Finally figured out you're all the same, Always coming up with some kind of story Every time I try to make you smile, You're always feeling sorry for yourself Every time I try to make you laugh, You can't your too tough You think you're loveless Is that too much that I’m askin for? Thought you'd come around when I ignored you, Sorta thought you'd have the decency to change But babe I guess you didn't take that warning, ’Cause I'm not about to look at your face again Can't you see that you lie to yourself? You can't see the world through a mirror It won't be too late when the smoke clears’ Cause I, I am still here But every time I try to make you smile, You'd always grow up feeling sorry for yourself Every time I try to make you laugh, You stand like a stone, Alone in your zone Is that too much that I’m askin for? Yeah-eya yeah-eya Can't find where I am, lying here alone in fear, Afraid of the dark, no one to claim alone again YEAH-EYA EYA EYA Can't you see that you lie to yourself? You can't see the world through a mirror, It won't be too late when the smoke clears’ Cause I, I am still here Every time I try to make you smile, You're always feeling sorry for yourself Every time I try to make you laugh,You can't your too tough You think you're loveless It was too much that I asked him for.

this song is 'Too much to ask' by Avril Lavigne,

I dont actually feel that lonely anymore but i have been for some time, its just hard when people say your lovely but your still alone. A person once gave me advice and said dont make my mistake and chase someone who doesnt care which i have been doing for some time now, its also harder when its them your chasing and they dont even realise. However, i have opened my eyes and i have decided to get on track and wait for someone who cares about me like i do them. I will not settle as i dont deserve to. This song still resounds that it is hard for some people to give the simplest things even though you give them so much. I also love the line 'you cant see the world through a mirror' to me this is someone looking at themselves and catching glimpses of the world around them but sometimes you do just have to look through your eyes or even through the eyes of others in a completely selfless way, it is knowing when to and when not to do this that i am working on in my life at the moment.

This idea also relates to my artwork which is often about self image and sterotypes, ideas of glamour so i may delve further into this!

Until then just to let you know i have a date with a lovely guy named james on friday :)

wish me luck x